2013 has arrived with all it’s might and glory, so I thought I’d go through 2012 to try to find the highlights and lowdowns. If not for others, at least for myself.
January started good, but turned into the worse when the whole “inappropriate images on facebook” started, and escalated pretty fast. It was a complicated issue, and february didn’t make anything better. The relationship started to decline fast, but I truly believed we got over it. March proved me wrong, and I got single. I took this very hard, as it came so fast and unexpected. April became a unending nightmare, but in May things started to stabilise. Or so I thought. Had a talk with my ex, and I thought we got things sorted out.
To get some fresh air, I went to the village where I grew up to spend a week alone in my mothers house. I still had trouble letting go, and things swandived the day I thought I saw The Evil Incarnate. I evacuated the place within 24 hours, and by pure luck, I got home to Sandnes the next evening.
My friendship with Toddi and Melissa started growing alot around the time of the break-up, it kept growing. There was the baptism of Sunniva, where I met alot of their friends (whom I later sadly got into some thingy with, so now we don’t talk.) Around this time I decided that I was not going to take a vacation until my mind had calmed down. So friendships became a major part of my life. Reconnected with Sara, which has proven to be a very healthy thing for me. Someone to talk to whom understood my situation. The summer came and went, and the fall could become a very bad drama movie for a wednesday airing. Drama everywhere. And when I got mine under control, I got involved into others. But stumbling forward, with good help from Sara, Toddi and Melissa, each day became easier to handle. Waking up wasn’t a chore anymore, cleaning my apartment became a joy when I did it my own way. Takes longer, but it works.
Then it was time to reconsider my living situation. I started to look out of the country for a cheaper place, and Sweden came first to mind. And in comes my older sister with her life! That deserves a blog post in itself. Finland was now the new goal. And as her relationship took off like a solid rocket, the thoughts turned into serious considerations.
October was pretty awesome, with Saras birthday party/halloween party. This was also when, for some unknown reason, my little sister broke off all contact with me. And soon after, my own birthday, which was the best one ever. I decided to celebrate my 30th + 1 birthday, as the year before wasn’t much to talk about. And so many people showed up. I had a blast, and will remember it forever.
And then came the dreaded December. Plans got made, got canceled, got puck back up. The 21th I canceled my plans to go to Finland for new years eve. Went to bed, and started thinking… Is anxiety gonna have control over me? Have I been working 12 years for nothing? Hell no. I decided that now it’s time to take a huge step. So I texted Linda an said I’m coming with you.
So here I am, in a town called Tampere in Western Finland, with Linda and her fiancé, Mias daughter with boyfriend, and some other friends. And I like them all. How often has that ever happened? I can’t even think of a match like that. There is snow outside, I’m in the kitchen, the others are watching “Hysteria” on the wall. I should be hung over, but looks like life want to show me some mercy today. And I’m happy.
Where is this going? No idea. But floating along is not an option anymore. Time to live again.
Yes, I’m happy.
Reality is cold, but it gets warmer with the people around you